Public School vs Homeschool

Unfortunately, I have noticed in the last couple of years, that homeschooling is as hot-button a topic as any other parenting decision. When I was pregnant, the raging debate was natural, unmedicated birth vs medicated birth vs c-section. Now, all these years later, does it matter? No, because we move on. The next debate is breastfeeding vs bottle feeding. Then attachment parenting vs traditional parenting. Cloth diapering vs disposable. Co-sleeping vs cribs. Homemade baby food vs store bought. Natural foods vs processed. Organic vs not-organic. Vaccines vs not. The list goes on and on and on and one would think that by the time our children reach preschool, kindergarten, grade school, middle school or high school, we would learn that every family is individual and makes the decision that is best for the family, right?! It appears, not so much. The hostilities on both sides of the "Public School vs Homeschool" debate are huge!

There are so many educational choices for parents today, that we should be grateful for the diversity of decisions parents can make to educate our children. You can choose public school, private school, charter schools, virtual academies, public online academy, coops, immersion, homeschool, unschooling........ {taking a breath} It is no longer "just" public school vs homeschool. It's so much bigger than that and we should be excited as parents by all the options that are available to teach our children! Choosing one way over another does not mean we love our children less, same as choosing to bottlefeed instead of breastfeeding means we don't love them. Or eat organic. Or not eat organic. Or cloth diaper. Or disposable diaper. Nor does it makes us a better parent, choosing one option over another.

I have noticed one difference in the schooling debate that, I believe, may very well be unique to schooling verses any other parenting decision. It seems that in almost all other debates, the moms are the ones who are the most emotionally-charged and can be the hardest on each other. That is not true with schooling. Moms are passionate, but so are dads. Dads can be as passionate and emotionally-charged about the education of their children as moms.

Our family went about homeschooling very gradually. I had toyed with homeschooling Austin from the time he was in 3rd grade, but was never confident enough to do it. I didn't do a lot of research on it, because it was just a thought and something I knew I couldn't really do. More of a pipe-dream really. By the time Aidan was in preschool, I knew I didn't want him to go to public school when he got to kindergarten, but still was a little uncertain if I could seriously educate him and how it may harm him socially (ha!). I prayed about it and had found plenty of scripture to back it up (will get to that in a moment), but my husband was not on board. Because I strive to be submissive, which for us is actually that we both agree on decisions, and that Steve has the "ultimate" decision, I was willing to wait on him. My prayer had to become that God would work on Steve's heart and move him towards that decision. That decision came when Austin was a freshman. By that time, we knew we would homeschool the others, but that we would wait until Austin graduated, so I could fully focus on his education. God moved quickly by the time Aidan was in 2nd grade and, by December, we knew we would be homeschooling all of our children the next year.

For us, it was never a decision we made lightly, and it was something we searched scripture and bathed in prayer. If it was only our will and not the Lord's, we would fail miserably. One scripture that was very important to us, and I am sure is important to many homeschooling families (but is definitely not exclusive to homeschooling, as it was important long before we did homeschool), is Proverbs 22:6 "Train a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it."  Another important scripture about seeking the Lord that came to us was from Poverbs 3:6 "In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Another important verse for us was Acts 5:29 "But Peter and the apostles answered, we must obey God rather than man."

In these verses, we found comfort knowing that we would be training our children the way that we saw the Lord guiding us to do so and in a way that was appropriate for our family. But to do that, we first had to submit to God to make that clear to us and have our hearts open to whatever He directed us to do, and, if that included homeschooling, it would be counter-cultural and we would be obeying God and not just "going with the flow" of public schooling. Which would be difficult in some aspects, but God does not ask you to do something that He has not equipped you for (Hebrews 13:21 "[He will] equip you in every good thing to do His will, working in us that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen."). He is always there to guide us, if only we seek Him.

There are many other verses about educating your child. How you discern it for you and your family is how the Lord reveals it to you. For us, each of the following verses directs us to educate our children at home ourselves.

Deuteronomy

11:19 - "You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."

4:9 - "Only take care and keep your soul diligently, lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. Make them known to your children and your children's children..."

6:5-7 - "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your  might. And these words that I command to you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit down in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."

Isaiah 28:8-11 "To whom will he teach knowledge, and to whom will he explain the message? Those who are weaned from milk and those taken from the breast? For it is precept upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little, there a little."

Psalm 78: 5-7 "He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments."

2 Timothy 3:16 "All scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work."

Colossians 2:8 "See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to elemental spirits of the world, and not of Christ."

Ephesians 6:4 "Fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."

God showed us that each of these verses was, for us, about teaching our children at home, where we are able to choose the curriculum we desire to teach our children, and rely on Him. But not a single one of those verses says anything about only homeschooling. All of these same verses may be taken differently by others and speak to how they are to raise their children generally and not specifically to the education of their children. To us, it speaks to how we are to raise our family in general, which includes their education. Each of us has to rely on God to discern His will for their own family. God has made each individual person unique and each family unique with unique purposes in life.

Finally, a few verses for all of us. We all are created by God and it must break His heart to see such division among His followers. We need to remember Who we serve and why.

Colossians 3:23 "Whatever you do, work at it heartily, as for the Lord and not for men."  God wants us to do whatever we do - stay at home mom, homeschooling mom, work at home mom, working mom, divorced, single, married, everyone - to do it for Him, and not anyone else. If we do that, we are doing exactly what we are designed to do. Serve God in everything that we do, all the time.

2 John 1:9 "Everyone who goes on ahead and does not abide in the teaching of Christ, does not have God. Whoever abides in the teaching has both the Father and the Son."  We are all to abide in Christ and the teaching of scripture - homeschool, public school, private school, coop, unschool, charter school.....

I am closing with 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 because I feel like sometimes we forget that we are all created by God for His purpose ultimately and we all must have love for each other. If we do not have love, how can we possibly love anyone else? How can we at all realize that we are not all cookie-cut people who are exactly the same and expect everyone to only do what we do and if they do not, they are wrong or don't love their children? When we love as Christ first loved us, we are able to see each other for who they are in Christ and not judge each other so harshly. Every single parent makes decisions constantly for their children that are based on what is best for their children. We all need to learn to respect each other and not think that one choice is "better" than another. Because it's not. Every decision made by parents for their children guided by the Lord, is the right decision for their family. Parenting is hard. Let's all come together and not divide ourselves so much, in every aspect of parenting. The Lord has given us fellow believers to have for fellowship here on earth...let's not lose that and divide it further!

1 Corinthians 13:1-8a;13
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind, love does not envy or boast, it is not arrogant, or rude. It does not insist on it's own way, it is not irritable or resentful, it does not rejoice at the wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. ... So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love."

Triplets Turn!

Lots has been going on and I still intend to go back and update on our lives over the summer, but I decided that if I wait until I have time to do that, I will never start blogging again! Which is not a good thing, because I pretty much use this as my journal to remember these crazy days of our children growing up. And that seems to be happening way too fast lately!

School started today for the triplets...I cannot believe that they are old enough and it is really, really odd and super quiet to have just Hannah and I at home for several hours. I have a lot of mixed emotions right now about them going. I want to homeschool so you can imagine how difficult it is to send all five, and especially the little three. I didn't want them to go to school until they were four if they were going at all. I only wanted them to have one year of preschool if they were going to go. I wanted them in Sumner for preschool - same as Austin and Aidan. I most certainly didn't want them going five days a week at three years old. I sure didn't want them riding a bus so young. And I most definitely didn't want them being gone from 7:25 until 1:00 every single day. Things change and don't go as we plan. The Lord has plans - plans for good and not to harm - plans to give a hope and a future. And when I step back and realize that I am not in ultimate control that it is up to God what happens in our lives then I also recognize the wonderful things that have come out of them going to school. They are very ready to go themselves. This gives them an opportunity to be with other children during the day. They are immensely enjoying preschool and can't stop talking about it. Their teacher is amazing and really does have their best interests at heart. Tripoli may not have been where I wanted them to go originally, but it sure is now! Tripoli has an excellent program that includes special education. Mrs. E is a special education instructor. Taking the bus makes them feel like big boys. They love Miss Becky, their driver. They get speech therapy twice a week, instead of once a week. Their other IEP goals and needs are met on Fridays, when the class size is much smaller. We are getting at least two more minds observing all three of them, but especially Nathanial and already things are sparking a "hmmm...." reaction. This means maybe, just maybe, we are closer to a referral to figure out what exactly is going on in that little brain. I am getting a lot of one-on-one time that Hannah is just soaking up and loving. Hannah and I are able to go to story hour and enjoy ourselves. I don't have to grow additional limbs to go to story hour! Hannah and I get errands done quickly and easily. Even though I was not prepared for everything our therapists had suggested way back in January of last year, I know that after much prayer the best decisions for them have been made. I know that God's love and desires for Nathanial, Ethan, and Noah are far greater than mine.

So, as they headed off for school on their very first day....I took lots of pictures!

Nathanial is ready!

Ethan is ready!

Noah is excited!

So excited....and a little unsure.

Of course I had to take another picture - with all five of my boys heading off!

Daddy 'herding' everyone to the waiting bus.

Now we're all a little nervous; but we never did cry!

Away they go!!!

Austin and Aidan's first day walking to school together...

Summer's Really Over

Austin and Aidan started school today (the triplets start tomorrow!). Both are back in Sumner this year - Austin starting high school (eek!!) and Aidan starting first grade. Aidan got the teacher he really wanted and was excited to see most of his friends are in his class. Austin has been through the high school a few times, so I think he is really ready for it. The high school went to a trimester schedule, so Austin only has six classes all day at 60 minutes a piece. I think this is going to be a great thing for all the students. They are doing it so kids have more opportunities during high school. I really like it so far!

Aidan's all ready for his first day of first grade!

Austin's ready for his first day of his Freshman year
of High School!!

I guess I'm embarrassing them and they really
wish I'd hurry it up.

Aidan in front of the school

At his desk - getting a touch nervous!

This proved to be the hardest part - the little blue bike
on the bike rack means only one thing.
Aidan is ready to get himself back and forth to school!

Therapy and Decisions

{I know I am way behind on blogs and will update all of that soon, I promise!}

The triplets had therapy this morning. They are still getting development and speech therapy monthly. They are to get each one for ninety minutes per month, but we have found for scheduling purposes it works much better to do all three together and do both therapists on the same day.

I knew that some of the things Julie, our developmental therapist and lead person, was going to be bringing up but today it was very in depth and detailed, so I am just a little overwhelmed with it all.

Ethan is doing fabulous, when he's alone and comfortable. He chatters and even is starting to use some 2-3 word sentences (this week's big one for all three: where aidi??) and he speaks the most clearly. He's very up to trying to say anything you want him to and usually does a great job.

Noah still jabbers on and on the most, but speaks the least understandably. He talks non-stop, but he drops the ends off words, mumbles, stutters, and has a bit of a lisp. But he does love to tell a story. He also loves to sing! He is also putting some 2-3 word sentences together. Noah does the best on names and loves saying everyone's names and uses them the most often.

Nathanial is the slowest to do it, but is still doing incredibly well. He tells me whole sentences, but you can only understand, at best, half of what is said. He also repeats any word you tell him and does a great job with that. He also has a lisp.

All three are definitely, speech-wise, getting there. They are way behind their same-age peers, but I am very happy with the progress we are seeing.

We are having some major issues still with biting, and now pinching. And the pinching is not nice...it's vicious and they leave horrible marks when they do it. Ethan and Nathanial (especially Thano) tend to do the most pinching, but Noah does his fair share also. Noah tends to hit more often when he's upset.

Lately, we've been noticing a lot of autistic-tendencies in Nathanial. I don't even really know if they are autistic tendencies, but there is something very different about Nathanial than the other two. I am convinced at this point he is either autistic or has ADD. As he gets older, it is becoming more and more obvious whereas the other two seem to be mellowing a bit with age. I brought my concerns up to Dr. B at their well baby visit this week (I'll update about that in a different post later), but he seemed to think that we could hold off for a bit and just watch him. His logic is that he is already in therapy, uses a pretty strict schedule, and not a lot would be gained by trying to get him diagnosed with something right now. At first, I was OK with that, but the more Steve and I discussed it the more we thought as long as we have people in place and resources at our disposal, why not use it? So I brought up everything he's been doing to Julie and she agrees it warrants a closer look. She also observed several of the behaviors I was describing in the short amount of time she was here. She wants to bring in the school psychologist who has observed them before again, this time at home during a therapy session, to specifically focus on Nathanial. I am relieved to know we are taking this step now because if he is autistic, then we can start more intense therapy with him immediately. She will observe him at the next visit and then recommend to us if she thinks we should take it a step further or wait.

The other thing that was brought up, which I knew was coming, was preschool. They are "almost three" and will age out of this level of therapy at three. She says at this point, she can guarantee that they are not ready to be done and will all be on an IEP. Which means we need to be making some big decisions in the next little while about what our next step should be. Julie wants them in preschool as soon as they turn three for several reasons. I do not. I did not, ideally, want them to start preschool until they were 4 1/2, but I did know that would probably not really happen. I also wanted them to go to preschool where everyone else has gone. That is now looking more and more like it will not happen at all. We can, of course, object and say no to her recommendations, but honestly, they would be better off in the preschool she is suggesting. She wants them in 4 half days per week and then move to 4-5 whole days per week at 4 1/2. The preschool she wants them in has a special education classroom with a special education teacher. The more that I am praying on this, it seems this is where they really need to be and where they could most flourish. My one problem with it has been that it is not in the same district or town that we are in. And that would mean they would go to kindergarten not knowing a single classmate. Then I realized that Aidan only knows a few of his classmates this year because most of his class went to morning preschool and he went to afternoon. I do feel better once I thought it all through from that angle.

Steve and I will have big decisions to make in the next few months for all of the boys...will you pray with us that we follow God's direction and His will makes it clear which way to go?

Wordless Wednesday

What?!??

I am posting this both on our blog about Austin and this blog, because while it deals specifically with Asperger's and Austin, it also deals with ignorance about larger families.

Some quick background - Austin has Asperger Syndrome, which is a type of high functioning Autism. Because of AS, he has a lot of sensory issues, plus a lot of anxiety.

For several years, Austin has worn his coat all day long at school. He refuses to take it off. I've spoken with him on several occasions about it when it first started, but then eventually gave up. Last year, because he was at a new school, I had to speak with him about it again because we got a lot of complaints about him wearing his coat all day. He still wore it. This year, there is a new guidance counselor.

When she started, I was so excited. She is fresh out of college and I thought she knew a little bit about AS. Now, I didn't expect her to be an expert, but she had heard of it and acted like she understood it. My hopes were dashed, as she may have heard about it, but understanding it is a whole other thing. She totally doesn't get it.

She has been e-mailing me for a long time and that has been good. However, as the weather got colder, I started getting e-mails about "the teachers" being concerned about Austin wearing his coat all day long and that "he might be cold" and "need more layers."

So, I decided to politely ignore the fact that most of these teachers knew Austin last year and knew that he would not take his coat off, so that didn't seem as much the point. I politely pointed out that he had on several layers under his coat (UnderArmor, a long sleeve shirt, and a hooded sweatshirt), so he was plenty warm and it was more a security/anxiety issue than anything else.

Do you know what she wrote back??? She said, and I quote, 'I'm glad to hear that he has options to wear at home and to help him with layers!' Seriously!?!?!? Like, because we have six kids, we can't possibly afford to clothe all six children and be sure they have enough options to keep them warm. What?!?! I was so offended and so angry that she ignorantly thought that we did not have enough money to afford our children.

Yes, maybe some people cannot afford all the children they have in a larger family. However, most larger families that I know, know that they can afford the children they already have and any future children they may have prior to having more children. Adding to one's family, especially a larger family, is not something taken lightly and not an accident. Everyone I know, myself included, knows they can feed and clothe all of their children in a manner which is weather-appropriate at all times. They may not be designer clothes (and sometimes they may be), but each child has what he/she needs.

In that same e-mail, she mentioned that the teachers were concerned his coat "wasn't clean." Well, I informed her I wash his coat three times a week. She was happy to hear that. I figure if I am washing the coat that often, then they really can't complain about it. It isn't dirty. So I've taken away the two reasons they want him to not wear his coat. And I've spoken with him about it. He's still wearing his coat daily and I'm fine with it. He has on layers, and it's clean - they can say nothing.

Why is a coat such a problem??? And, seriously, of all the issues we have had with him, why pick on the coat?? And if that's their only complaint right now, then we are doing MIGHTY good!!!

Report Cards and Videos

Aidan got his report card and it was great! He has grown so much in one year. Last year, we were concerned because he was so shy, wouldn't interact with others, and was just socially having a really hard time.

This year, he is making lots of friends, he's on task, he's involved all the time and shares with others, he is able to complete all tasks, he's just doing great. I am so thankful we decided not to send him to kindergarten. Socially, he really wasn't ready. This is giving him that extra boost he needed.

It's such a relief to know he's doing well...one less thing to worry about in the course of a day!

Aidan learned a "Fat Turkey" song and it is hilarious, but for some reason, blogger is not uploading videos. I've reported it and it says they are "aware" of the problem. Until they fix it, you can see his "Fat Turkey" and another video here. It's hilarious!

While you're at it, here's a video of Nathanial dancing - they love Go Fish. While Nathanial was dancing, Ethan was up to no good coloring in a book. I probably should have taken it away, but instead I videotaped it! Noah was holding and kissing Hannah, while watching and doing a little jig to the Go Fish Guys.

Hopefully, Blogger will figure out their videos soon, so I can get them on here!

First Day of School!

Aidan's first day of preschool is today. He was a little nervous, I could tell, but also excited. This year, they wanted to do a four day preK class. Because of the 3-4 class, a four day could not be figured out. So, they are going longer hours on the three days they are there. I am so excited by his new hours! He goes to school at 12:15 and then can be picked up anywhere between 3:40 - 3:50. The babies will be getting their full naps (yay!) and I can pick up Austin first from the bus, then go get Aidan. Austin's bus gets to town at about 3:35 at the high school, then we just zip over two blocks and pick Aidan up at the preschool.

His class size this year is much larger than last year. Last year, he had 8 kids in his class. This year there are 14! That's a lot for our town and the afternoon class. There is another Aidan in his class, also, so our Aidan is now Aidan C. He had homework to do, so I made sure he knew to put the Aidan C on it. I knew it was coming sooner or later anyway. The funny coincidence is that Austin is Austin C in his class and there is an Austin S. Aidan is now Aidan C and there is an Aidan S! I hope not all of my children go through this, but inevitably, they probably will. I gave up on original names when Austin's name skyrocketed the year after he was born (he's the oldest in his class) and Aidan's skyrocketed the year after he was born (he's also now the oldest in his class). I clearly remember after Aidan was born, being asked to repeat his name, how it was spelled, asked what it meant, etc., etc., etc. Now it's "oh, another Aidan." Ahhh!! Ethan climbed way up the year we named him (I believe it's number 2 or 3). Nathanial is now in the top 100 and so is Noah. The new baby's name has been climbing on the name charts lately, but it is a classic name. I don't even care anymore.

When I asked Aidan if he was nervous about going, he said "No, Lily's going to be there and she'll remind me of Sarah." Sarah is last year's "love." He's still upset she went on to kindergarten without him. He likes Lily, too, though, so I'm sure he will be fine!

Back to School!!!

Austin and Aidan are back to school today! Yay!! It will be so nice to be able to get back to routine and "normal" again.

Austin came home and was a little upset about his grade on his semester test in math, but he said he tried his hardest and he just didn't understand it. He also said it took him the entire class time to finish it, which is most important because he rushes everything to get it done so he can read. He also had a boy who was put into his enrichment study hall that he doesn't get along with and was upset about that. Thankfully, his favorite teacher is in that study hall, so I told him to speak with her before study hall and ask her if she can help to keep him away from Austin. I'm glad he trusts her enough to do it, because he said he will. He's in the study hall because they limit it to 15 students and it has a certified teacher in it. It is more structured than the "regular" study hall and more peaceful. The other study hall is just all the kids in the library. It can get a little chaotic and he needs small and peaceful. But it is mostly for kids who have trouble in school keeping their grades up (hence the certified teacher in it), and this child did poorly last semester so was moved into that study hall. At least he'll only be in it with him 3 days a week.

I have been kind of bad about posting lately, but hopefully with school back and getting more into a routine, I will be able to post more often. I did back date some posts, so you can check back further if you want.

And a meeting...

Austin has done exceptionally well this year with responsibility, turning in his work, on time, and getting things done in a timely manner. In fact, he's done so well, I was beginning to wonder what was going on. He usually does very well the first 3-4 weeks, then peters out and "forgets" stuff. Last week, I got "the call" and e-mails from several teachers. His work wasn't turned in and he was just "out of it." And not until I got home did I remember that last week, they had two late arrival days. That would probably be the main reason for all of this.

So today I met with them. I informed them that he is doing much better this year than he has in the past, considering it's December and almost semester end and usually this sort of work doesn't even make it through the first quarter. I tried to explain the wonders of Asperger's and his lack of organization, but once again all I heard about was how intelligent he was, how well read he was, and how articulate and what a vocabulary he had. Soooo...you didn't do any research on Asperger's, then, is what you're telling me???

His science and social studies teacher has been concerned because he's been a little speed demon again (remember the famous F on a science test of all things???), but when he turned in his last test, he did very well. He was done in 5 minutes flat and he kept asking him to be sure to look it over again and make sure he didn't have any wrong, but Austin insisted he was done and read the rest of the class. Well, sure enough, he got two wrong and got an A on that test. Sometimes I just feel like screaming and wishing he would fail...only to learn that fastest isn't always the best in life!

He's also apparently taken a liking to hiding his coat behind the door of a nearby classroom, instead of putting it into his locker, when he decides to take it off at all. Hmmmm...wonder why that's happening? Wouldn't have anything to do with his locker being chuck-full of garbage, would it?? So he was talked to about that. He also wears his coat and gloves most of the day and they were concerned about that. I did inform them that he wears his coat all day at home. One of two things is happening there. Either he is, once again, not eating and losing weight and can't keep warm, or just as likely, the coat has become part of his "uniform." I sometimes think they must believe that he has only two shirts and one pair of pants and they never get washed. He routinely wears the exact same clothes over and over and over (and I was them every single night). His dresser drawers and closet are filled to overflowing with very nice clothes, but he won't deviate from his "uniform." So, hence, the coat has become an article of clothing that he must wear. This is not a battle I am willing to fight and, in the long run, really doesn't matter, so I told them to ignore it and let him do it.

He got his ITBS test results back today. I haven't seen them, but they did tell me that in two or three, he was once again off the charts (100% accuracy and 13+ grade level). They were ever so proud of themselves as a school...or at least, the principal was. I didn't tell him they have very little to do with it. At any rate, I hope that he brings home the results himself in the next couple of days so I can look them over myself.

I also talked with the principal and he said that he did indeed, punish the young lady to the fullest extent after talking with both Austin and her. He said Austin did admit to saying she liked a 10 year old, but she admitted to saying I got pregnant by Austin. The only comment he couldn't prove was the "gay" comment (because that word is banned) and "noone" heard her say that. They did hear everything else, though. He spoke with several "witnesses" and decided it was a "balancing act" and he decided to trust Austin "this time." And I quote "I just hope I did the right thing." Oh, trust me, you did.

All in all, a pretty good meeting and it seems like Austin is still doing well. They said they could tell that I had spoken to him, because he is buckling down a lot better this week. I warned them that after Christmas break, it would be a nightmare again, and he would take a good 2-3 weeks at a minimum to get back into a routine. Hopefully I'm proven wrong, but I doubt it...

Fascinating

Austin has been getting interesting things in the mail from different places the last couple of years. Last year, it was People to People...a group that takes student "ambassadors" to different countries to learn and live in those cultures. My little sister went to Australia with them and loved it. You have to maintain a certain GPA and test scores in order to even qualify to be a part of the group. You have to be either nominated by a teacher/counselor or referred based on GPAs and test scores (ie, ITBS). Last year, he was offered to go to Canada for two weeks. We declined...he would just be entering 6th grade and we figured the oppurtunity would present itself again if he was meant to do it, when he's older. And with the Asperger's, it would be difficult for him to be away from us for that long.

This year, he was once again referred to People to People, this time it was to Australia and longer. We are declining again, we just don't think he's ready. Both oppurtunities have come to us with his former last name. I thought it was just a People to People thing.

Then Saturday, we recieved an invitation for him to submit his biography to Who's Who Registry of Acedemic Excellence - Middle School Edition. I was a little shocked, but also intrigued because, once again, it came under the old last name.

I don't really want him to miss out on these oppurtunites because of a clerical error (for one thing, Who's Who offers scholarships), so Icalled Who's Who to ask them how to change it. They changed it in their system, but then told me I needed to call the registry and change it, so all companies had his correct name. Apparently, his name is already, in sixth grade, on a registry of America's top students, based on his test scores and GPAs. It's a little overwhelming to think that someone somewhere is watching my son's test scores and grades and he is being offered phenominal things because of it. It's also a lot of pressure to put on him at this age. He knows about the People to People offers (he's seen the letters), but he doesn't know about the Who's Who thing yet. I really don't want him to pressure himself even more than he already does.

What's fascinating to me is that we already expect so much out of kids. They have to know so much to even get into preschool these days...it's rather sad. By middle school, Austin has been concerned about college for over two years. Two years! At age 12! It's outlandish. Yes, there is nothing wrong with wanting your child to do their best and really apply themselves. But they also shouldn't have to worry about being on some list and falling off that list if they fail to test well at some point. I almost wish these companies would back off until at least high school...if not even just your senior year.

I am very proud of Austin for doing so well, I don't want to say that I am not with all this. I just wish kids had more time to be kids.

Yes, I am going to apply for him to be in the Who's Who publication. Steve was in it in high school and I think it is an honor. He's always said it was "no big deal." I happen to think it is and I think it's fantastic that they profile those kids that do work their hiney off.

First Day of School

Austin made it great through his first day and appears to really like it! We had our orientation on Monday night and he really had his schedule down pat and he seemed to be doing pretty well. There was a lot of information and it was a little overwhelming for him. Fascinatingly, the principal actually told the kids he expected they do extremely well on their ITBS because of No Child Left Behind or the school would get in trouble and it was up to them to make sure it didn’t. Hmmmm….last I checked that was the teacher's job. Talk about pressure right out of the gate! Last year his teacher said she would give a list of names of kids who would help Austin get through his day and the middle school said they would find at least one child to help him get from one class to the next, but they couldn't guarantee it would be the same kid. It became VERY obvious Monday night who she had chosen. There were two boys whose schedules (other than enriched study hall) were EXACTLY the same. And they were boys I figured would help him out anyway. That was reassuring! The hardest part is they don't allow sucks or gay to be said at all, zero tolerance, and his favorite word lately is sucks. I've tried and tried to get him to knock it off...hopefully now he really will. As I told him, it is a LONG 17 miles to Freddy to be walking when he gets a detention at 7 am. They also give detention for homework not getting done. I was a little upset about that. One of his “accommodations” is for his teachers to write the assignment down for him in his book and sign off if it is done or not because he can't follow through or copy things from board to paper well. Yet, yesterday his assignment book came home with only his writing in it and noone checked it off to say it was done. The problem with him not having anything formal is that they don’t HAVE to follow the accommodations…it is all just “recommended.” Thankfully, he brought it all home for me to check. This is exactly why I asked for him to be in an enriched study hall and she didn't do it. I can only hope it’s because it was the first day and they’ll get it down soon. The lovely enrichment teacher told them that they were in there because their grades had dropped or test scores had dropped and there was no screwing around. While this might be true of some kids, it certainly isn't for all (ie, Austin). I was a little upset she said that to all of them. She could have just said it was a study hall. He was upset because he thought she meant he was stupid. He was so excited when he came home because he had his schedule down and the building down and he was able to help other kids find their rooms. He loved the lunch (better than Sumner!) and the fact that they had a salad bar that he could get as much as he wanted from. You actually have control over what your child eats and we had to specify how many times he could get more. I checked "as many as he wants!" They are bussed to the elementary because their school doesn't have a lunch room and he handled that well, also. They also have one period a day mid-morning referred to as "advisory." It's pretty much homeroom and they are given that period to take a break and chat or read or whatever, and get a snack. He can purchase healthy snacks and juice from his teacher or bring his own. All his classes are a total of 20 minutes because they cram 11 into a day...I don't know how teachers get anything done in that short of an amount of time! He found his friend at the bus stop in the morning and rode with him every time on the bus, which was good. He said he made the lunch and afternoon busses in plenty of time, also. I re-wrote his schedule for him with exactly when to go to his locker and what to take with him at that time and what to do with homework and highlighted those parts, also. Unfortunately, they cannot take their bookbags with them at all to any classes, not even the last one and he has to get from one end of the building to the other to his locker, quick get everything he needs in his bag, and out to the bus at another end in under 5 minutes or he misses the bus. I am sure in the beginning they are given a little more time...I just hope he continues to make it on time! Last year, he had to have 16 book reports done by the end of the year, 4 each quarter. Anything above that was extra credit, which was great for him because he loves to read. This year, a grade older, they only have to do ONE! Anything over and above that is not extra credit, but they earn "rewards" for them! WHAT??!?? Rewards for reading....that is about the dumbest thing I ever heard of. Why not continue to just expect it or at the minimum, make their "reward" a better grade? I am still not sure if it is because they broke out according to reading ability in grade school and they do not at the middle school level or what. There are some big difference because we switched districts...it is still just whole-grade sharing, we have yet to merge, so each district sets their own standards. His teachers all seem great and I think he is really going to enjoy them. He has already decided Mr. N is his favorite teacher...big shock. Mr. N teaches science.Aidan is getting VERY excited to start preschool. We have orientation for that next week. He cannot wait. This is a hard year for me with Austin starting middle school and Aidan starting preschool. I felt like a dork when I dropped Austin off at the bus, restrained myself from getting out, and started crying watching him walk to the bus!I kinda wish that I could have done this a little more gradually, but Aidan needs something of his own and needs interaction with peers. He’s not so good with the whole sharing thing!Noah now has two teeth! Steve taught Nathanial and Ethan how to hold their own bottles a few weeks ago and they are really starting to get it down. Nathanial rarely drops his bottle now and can even hold it up in the air to get everything out. Ethan is learning to put it up in the air, also, and can take it out of his mouth and get it back in again, as long as he doesn’t drop it (which he tends to do quite a bit!). On Monday night, they were all hungry at the same time, which they always are, so Steve put Noah on the floor and tried him. The little stinker held on to his bottle for Daddy! He wouldn’t for me! Last night, he did it again and Noah did it for him again…with me in the room! So, this morning, I lined them all up, handed them their bottles, and sat by them. They all fed themselves!!! Yeah!!! This makes it a little easier at feeding time! Noah and Ethan still drop theirs quite a bit, but that’s fine with me. They are also LOVING eating “real” food. I just run from one to the next in a line and keep it coming. Noah and Ethan are not real good about waiting their turn, but they have no choice. As always, I added more pictures to the dropshots page of Austin’s first day and babies holding bottles, etc.